Wednesday, January 11, 2012

My Positive Life Change: A Target Weight for Future Pregnancy

At the start of every year, I seem to have a routine: start a resolution & begin a blog. Usually 3 months later, I have another routine: drop the resolution and stop the blog.

Well, this year I have dropped the term"resolution" and have adopted the phrase, "Positive Life Change". The good part, I've put money on it, so I'm more apt to keeping up with this life change, and I technically began before Christmas, so I was psyching myself up for it for a good 10 days.

What is it you ask? I joined a gym, yeah, a lot of people do that around the start of the year with a resolution to "lose more weight and look great". I do confess, those were my goals in years past. In 2012, this takes on a deeper meaning and a purpose for more than vanity's sake. For my first appointment at my gym I was scheduled for a weigh and measure, where I found out that in the past 2 years I had put on 26 pounds, and that my current weight of 176 (the heaviest I've ever been in my life!) included 66 pounds of body fat! I was so distracted by those numbers that I could not process my measurements that followed as a personal trainer took the tape to my apple shape. I must have had a look of shock on my face - the trainer asked me if I was alright. I was honest and shared that my current weight was my Mt. Everest peak. She tried to console me, but I was in a daze. She had a tone of empathy as she asked what my goal weight was. I drew a blank. I truthfully stated I didn't have one. For the first time since I've been on a weight loss journey (since puberty), I did not have a number in mind, only the thoughts of  "I want to be healthy. I want to be fit. I want to have a baby."

Two years ago, about 3 weeks after I married my husband, we had thoughts of starting a family once we were more settled in our marriage and I was more healthy. Back then, I was 150 pounds and I thought myself too heavy for a healthy pregnancy. Naturally, I planned to work on this. I threw myself full-fledged into my nonprofit work, which means I started spending 14 hour days sitting at a computer, sometimes eating 2 or 3 meals there. And thus began my weight gain. Terrible. Unhealthy. Never Again. It is now so painfully relevant why I've been so void of energy. Ugh. Add to this energy drain the stress of being an executive director of a new nonprofit, and I see the recipe for my disaster.

So, now I have a new recipe: eat right (more veggies, more fruit, more water, less junk food, less caffeine, and more often because I tend to eat only twice a day) better sleeping hours, less stress, a de-stress activity or two, and a whole lot more exercise. Consistency. It seems simple, especially since I actually enjoy breaking a sweat and feeling a rush of endorphins.

I have yet to mention, that the kind personal trainer gave me a goal weight - 130 pounds. I'm not quite sure I want to go that low...the thought of it is kind of scary. I haven't weighed that little since I was 15, so I kind of don't remember what it is to be that size. Or shape. I do not have a concept in my mind what I would look like. But that really isn't the point - the point is to get to a body that is healthy to bear children. And I am going to partly use this blog to keep myself motivated and on track.

So far, I am 4 workouts into the plan and consciously making healthier food choices. Here's to a healthier me!
- Jen                           

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